Now, this will come as no surprise to, well, everyone I know, but I have a horrid habit of over-complicating my life. I do. The worst part is that 99% of the time, I have no idea that I'm doing it until I'm well in the midst of it. Or, really, until after the fact. It's what I do and it's always how I've been, unfortunately. It is what it is, and if I could change one thing about myself, that would be it. And if I were to ask friends, family, and those who genuinely love and care about me, they would concur wholeheartedly that this is the number one thing that needs to change about me.
Now, before you roll your eyes, this is not a "woe is me" post. This is, in fact, just the opposite, and may even be my most pragmatic post to date. I fully acknowledge my faults and I make a genuine effort to correct myself and grow as a person (to the best of my ability and as much as I allow myself to, anyway). I carry no illusion of perfection, nor will I ever. However, that also means that I have much potential and room to grow as a person, which is something I am ever-striving for.
Before I continue, let me share some quotes with you: "Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose." - President Lynden B. Johnson. "Tomorrow is the most important thing. Comes to us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday." - John Wayne. "I can't go back to yesterday, because I was a different person then." - Lewis Carroll. "I am better than I was yesterday, but not as good as I will be tomorrow." - Anonymous. "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. For each day has enough trouble of its own." - Jesus (Matthew 6:24). The core of these quotes is that most of what we worry most about is truly beyond our control and we fill our lives with unneeded stress in changing the uncontrollable. What we (very much including myself in this) should focus instead on, is making the most out of opportunity when it presents itself and let the course of life be shaped from these seized opportunities. "Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength." -Corrie Ten Boom.
Now, what does this mean to me? Now is the time for me to simplify and prioritize my life. Clean house: physically, mentally, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually, etc. My professional life is on the verge of becoming a huge time consumer, so I need to focus on simplifying and structuring my life around that. Focus on what truly matters and leave out all the rest. My friends (the true ones) have supported me through this journey and will continue to do so. My family...well, hopefully they will also support me, as well. What is most important is that I grow into the best person I can be and keep striving to be even better than that. Not in a pursuit of perfection, but in a pursuit of inner peace. Which is something I need most in my life.
Now, what does it mean for you, dear reader? It means, more writing! No, seriously. Blogging helps me get out what is currently taking up way too much head space and this coming November I will be once again taking a stab at NaNoWriMo. I need to write and much of the chaos that I go through can be circumvented with me putting words to paper (or, on screen, if you will). Even though I was born to write, it does have a bad habit of taking back seat to the rest of my life; and that is one of my top priorities to change imminently.
So there you have it. Thank you, once again, for taking time out of your life to glimpse into mine. It means much to me that this blog is even glanced at. Take care of yourselves and you will hear from me soon.
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