Most of my life I've been short and scrawny. Also, since the third grade, I have worn glasses, which were never the "in" thing until the hipster movement as of late. This means I was an easy target for bullies and throughout most of my schooling, I had a lot of them. Taunting was always the most common form, and despite the nursery rhyme of "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me", they do hurt. There were even times when it escalated to kids wanting to beat me up because I was a "runt".
Thankfully I gained some friends who were much taller and tougher than me, which cut down a solid portioning of the bullying I received. There was an incident in junior that I still rembrr vividly when I walked down the wrong area during lunchtime and was stopped by two kids who immediately began to harass me and one of them was about to beat me up. Thankfully, from behind me came rushing three of my much taller and tougher friends who immediately came to my rescue and the two kids who were going to fight me fought them, instead. However, I didn't always have friends who came to my rescue and it didn't always end favorably for me. I learned to fight the hard way and I also learned out to talk myself out of a fight.
Unfortunately, being a target followed me into adulthood. There was a year when I was mugged twice, and it would have been a third time had I not pulled a knife. When I was living in that particular city, I always had to change my route and schedule to avoid getting "jumped". Even now I have a great disdain for Federal Way (the city in question) because of all that happened there.
As I mentioned in the beginning, it's s touchy subject for me. I believe that I don't have the victim mentality, but when getting tormented by others who thing their superior to you follows you through most of your life, you start to believe them. You start to believe you're an outcast because you don't look like the social norm. You start to believe that you deserve what you get because you're not big and buff. You start to believe that you're stupid for being so smart. You start to believe them that you're not worth it.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will always hurt me.
