The "D" Word

I logged on to Facebook (a site I admittedly spend way too much time on) tonight and a friend of mine had shared an article called "10 Things to Keep in Mind When Loving a Highly Creative Person": http://iheartintelligence.com/2015/07/08/loving-a-highly-creative-person/ With me potentially dipping my toes back into the dating pool, I read and immediately shared the article. It's a short article and 100% spot on. Let me go into detail.

The very first thing listed was "their minds don't slow down". This struck a massive cord. I joke that my brain doesn't have an off button, but the reality is is that it is constantly going. Fast. In a thousand different directions. At the same time. Everything from quantum physics and far off planets to what the average breakfast was for someone living in the Roman Empire. How would dragons pull off flight to what was the subject of the Mona Lisa thinking about as she was being painted (she did have a smirk, you know). Or I'm thinking about work, and the things that are popping up on a daily basis. Problems and possible solutions. Actually, I spend much of my off time thinking about work. This new job is never without a new conundrum; but I digress.

The second one is that we are very cyclical. "The flow of creativity is cycle, full of highs and lows". This also struck a cord. One thing that I have noticed that sets me apart from others is that I have deeper emotions. I take rejection hard; even some that are rather minor. On the flip side, my laughter has been known to fill a room. I am passionate to a fault. And I can be somber - sometimes unexpectedly.  When I feel something, I feel it with all of me. By the way, number five goes into this, as well.

The third one is that we need time alone. This is big for me - and a big reason why I am reluctant to start dating again. I need my alone time. Desperately. Especially with how mentally demanding my new job is. As much as I love being around others - especially friends and family; I need to recharge. And the only way to do that is complete solitude. That's why I take walks. To sort my head out and to regroup so I can handle the rest of the world. I need peace and silence. Which is something that is not readily available in a relationship. When I need to be alone, I need it to be 100%. No other human contact. Even that special someone.

Number four is that we are intensely focused. When I'm working out a problem in my head, I've been told that I look extremely angry. I've even had bosses ask if I was okay, because of this. The fact of the matter is that I'm completely oblivious to what is happening around me. I'm entirely in my head and I'm trying to solve a stumbling block. The same goes for when I am having a conversation with someone. My full attention is on them and the topics at hand. That's why I find small talk awkward. I don't know how to do it. And when my brain slips into creativity mode - well, the rest of the world might as well not exist.

The sixth one is something that I didn't even think about until now. We speak in stories. It's true, though, and entirely done subconsciously. I am quite literally a storyteller - even when I'm not trying to be. It's just who I am and how I communicate. I guess that's why people enjoy talking with me.

The seventh and ninth ones are so beyond crucial: "They battle with themselves" and "they struggle with confidence". If there is one thing I need most for my future partner to understand is this (and the importance of alone time). I am, without a doubt, my own worst enemy. I am at war with myself far more than most people realize. When I doubt myself, I doubt hard. Personally, professionally, creativity, the whole gambit. When one little seed of self doubt takes route, it's impossible to stop it becoming a full tree. I have steamrolled my own success far more than all others combined. I fully acknowledge and struggle with the fact that I am the one holding me back.

But, the flip side of this coin is that (number eight) "intuition is important". I go with my gut and I run with it. I will trust my gut over anything else when it comes to decision making. Because I am so prone to overthinking things, if my intuition is telling me something, I listen and follow suit.

And the last one, which is lighthearted: "growing up is hard to do." "Creative people are almost always children at heart". You don't need any further example than Robin Williams. I know I am a big kid when I am able to be. It's also why kids love me - I still know how to play and can relate to their overwhelming imaginations. Sure, I can be mature, but I also take immense pleasure in simple things.


So, yes, this article is an excellent way to understand me better (if that is what you wish). I know that being such a creative person means that I am not going to be the easiest partner to be with - but I also know that because of these traits, it will be fully worth it.